女同志家庭親職實作

Abstract

異性戀體制將家庭階序化(hierarchy)之後，產生了家庭價值優位，我稱這個優位的家庭想像為「夠格家庭」。本研究關心，生養孩子的女同志家庭，如何與主流社會中的異性戀體制及其夠格家庭想像協商生存空間，異性戀常態化(heteronormativity)如何在各個層面以不同方式介入女同志家庭實作；而女同志家庭又用什麼行動來凝聚家庭認同，並且發展出哪些協商策略。在異性戀體制中，不平等的制度常對同志家庭造成直接的壓迫，本文將分析養育孩子的女同志家庭有哪些制度保障的需求，並且針對當前台灣同志運動對於爭取同志婚姻的不同運動策略提出回應。 本研究發現，在女同志伴侶生育孩子的過程中，原生家庭的異性戀父權邏輯仍強烈干預女同志的家庭實作，其中血緣和姓氏是異性戀父權邏輯運作的重點。透過要求女同志伴侶的孩子符合異性戀家庭體制的血緣和姓氏邏輯，異性戀原生家庭將女同志家庭納入家庭系譜；而女同志家庭則藉由拆解和操作孩子與原生家庭的血緣象徵，得以進入異性戀家族網絡並近用家族資源。在經營家內關係方面，女同志伴侶及孩子之間的親屬關係藉由稱謂與親職實作來相互確認；由於共同家長(co-parent)與孩子的關係並非自然成立，因此持續地做親職(doing parenting)並得到孩子的雙向確認，共同家長與孩子之間的親屬關係才會成立。 女同志家庭在面對異性戀體制中的「夠格家庭」正典時，會意識到自己家庭的邊緣處境，並期待向夠格家庭靠近。在此，女同志家庭會運用兩個相互關聯的策略：一個是以做更好的親職來自我肯定，並抵抗同志為不適任父母的污名；另一個是要求孩子的行為符合社會規範，以具體彰顯同志家庭的良好親職。在此，女同志家庭以好的親職另立家庭典範，鬆動異性戀體制下的夠格家庭概念邊界，擴大了夠格家庭的內涵。然而可能的危險是，以強調孩子的行為符合社會規範，並以好的親職作為躋身夠格家庭的策略，也可能反過來強化其他社會規範，限縮了夠格家庭的進入條件。 最後，我建議師資培訓與學校教材均應落實性別平等教育課綱，以避免將性別教育的責任轉嫁到同志家庭的孩子身上，或讓同儕和教職人員的家庭歧視，造成同志家庭孩子求學過程中的困境，而放大同志家庭間的階級差異。另外，拉媽的家庭經驗指出，藉由締結兩人關係而延伸出來的家庭保障，並不完全適用異質的女同志家庭型態；我因此提出，應消解以締結雙人關係來延伸家庭保障，反而要將家庭直接視為保障的主體，如此才能夠同時解放組織家庭的方式，並解放人們對於親密關係的想像。

This study examines several concerns faced by lesbian families with children: how these families negotiate the boundary of a “qualified family” within the mainstream heterosexual system; how the force of heteronormativity shapes the daily practices of lesbian families with children in various aspects; what strategies are used to reinforce their family identification while negotiating with the system. In view of the systematic discrimination against non-heterosexual families, the study also discusses demands for institutional protection for lesbian families with children, as well as reflects on different schemes for legalizing same-sex marriage in the contemporary gay rights movement in Taiwan. The study shows that the family of origin under patriarchy still strongly intervenes how a lesbian couple “do” their own family. In particular, blood ties and family names are two major mechanisms through which patriarchy influences a lesbian couple’s childbearing and rearing process. In fact, the heterosexual family of origin intends to integrate lesbian family into its pedigree by making a connection through blood and family name; on the other hand, the lesbian couple may also take advantage of resources from their family (families) of origin by strategizing the use of blood ties and family names. Further, the relationship between a lesbian couple and their child are established on and strengthened by both appellation and parenting. Because the co-parent and the child are not of the same blood, parenting is the key to maintaining their family relationship. In addition, the family prototype in the heterosexual system, namely the “qualified family”, may constantly remind lesbian families of their marginal status in the social structure. To combat the stigma of gay parenting, lesbian families may use two related strategies: being a better/model parent and disciplining their children according to social norms. These strategies may expand the definition of the “qualified family” by including those lesbian families that achieve model parenting; however, the strategies may simultaneously raise the standard of the “qualified family”, leaving more families “unqualified”. Finally, the study suggests improving the current education and marriage systems. Specifically, the government should enforce the sex/gender equality curriculum to eliminate peer discrimination against students from non-heterosexual families. Also, educators should receive training to treat families with diverse sexuality/gender backgrounds equally and to enhance the learning experience of students from non-heterosexual families. This is particularly important for children from non-heterosexual families with low socio-economic status because these families often lack adequate resources to select a more LGBTQ-friendly school, or to invest in their children’s academic learning for promising performance which may be traded for equal treatment. Moreover, the current marriage system only entails rights and responsibilities for families based on couple relationship. Since lesbian families have various types, including alternative families, this study suggests that the legal definition of and protection for family should not only be limited to couple-based families.